Sufferings of Being an Adult

David Foster Wallance said “Being what you called “grow-up”, isn’t a lot of fun a lot of time. There are things you have to do. There are things you want to do, that you can’t do for variety of reasons”. Indeed, being an adult, there is a constant struggle for me. The struggle between bodily desire and rationality. Desire like craving for food are animal instinct that I’m always bound. I feel immensely satisfied when I get what I desire. At the same time, the things that I desire exhausts me, and reduces me to an animal when there are too much of them. There is a part of me that wants freedom, which is what my rationality wants. My rationality wants to be a master over my bodily desire which is deceitful and always changes. My body cries out from time to time that tells me to come back for lack of things that it wants. I know my body’s need. But I had to let my rationality to be the master. The constant struggle is not easy. Sometimes, I’m overcome by the bodily desire, while in other times my rationality reclaims its crown.

Why do I choose the constant struggle? Why not submit to my desire which is fun and interesting? These are questions that my body would ask of me like a witch who is misleading a lost child who wants to find home. Suppose I do submit to the bodily desire, my raitionality says. The more fun I have from the desire, the more pain I feel afterward. The bodily desire is endless. I become exhaust and hopeless for being better, in which case I miss the peaceful mind that my rationality gives me. Overcoming isn’t easy, which is what makes me sastifying in a different sense than that of bodily desire. I want to overcome my bodily desire and grow intellitually.